Saturday, May 16, 2009

why women hate women

Why Women hate Women

Posted by Speaking Silence

I could never fathom the whole concept of women hating women in India. Why do mothers kill girl-child in their womb,why married women outcast widow, why mother-in-laws burn brides, why mothers love boy-child more than girls , why do they feed boys more than girls as happen in many communities? Why do women hate each other?

How can we change, how will people change and how will the world change when women never support women. We are weak because we are alone. We have no support not even from our own sex. Why is it so ?

Sex-selective abortion are not always forced upon by husbands and in-laws , they are often done in consensus by the mother. I have seen it so many times, in my own house, in my neighbours house. I have seen it first-hand and heard it from many friends. Maybe that's the way world rules and suppress us by turning us against each other. And we all are so well-trained in it. Have you every been to a village in India? I have been to one. Village of my parents. We went there every year for 3 months and I have seen abuse and humiliation. I have heard tales of horror and tales of abortions. Women discussing how to have a male-child,women discussing how to abort if its a girl-child, women getting abortions after ultrasound. I have seen it first-hand. I don't need to see any documentary for this stark reality. I feel it in my veins. I experienced it from my own mother. Because she desired a male-child and unfortunately God never bestowed this pleasure to her. She bore three girl and I am the second one. We grew up with a huge hole , a big dark vacuum in our house. Absence of a male-child. Not that I was beaten up or starved or not given education. I was given all that just like every child in Delhi, good food and good education. But I knew the existence of this sorrow deep within my parents . I knew the stabbing pain that they harbored. I resented it but never held any grudges against them until my own child was born. A girl child. I felt that same sorrow and anger oozing out of my mother against her . She almost cursed God but I will not let this happen to my daughter.I will never let her feel that gush that my mother sends to me. I will protect her till my last breath and I will teach my child to love women. I will teach her to uphold her pride. I will teach her to stand tall as a woman .

How can a mother , a grandmother do such a thing. I feel at loss at all of this, at my mother , my community, my relative, my village and my country. What should I tell my daughter about India? That it is a land where girls are killed for being a girl. That women are raped in day-light , that girls are teased in crowd. That women hate each other so much. I feel at loss . I feel sad and angry. I feel betrayed.


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